How to Outshine the
Close More Sales with...
Sneaky Little NLP Tricks...
By Dianne Ruth,
Here is the
Real SECRET: People like people who are like them!
apply whether you are marketing a product, a service, interviewing for a
job, attending a social event, or trying to communicate with your teenager.
Position your body to be similar to the other
person’s. For instance, if the other person is leaning back and relaxed,
you lean back and relax too.
If the other person is sitting with an
ankle resting across their other knee, you cross your legs at the
ankles. If they reach up and touch the back of their neck, you reach up
and adjust your glasses or stroke your chin.
said similar. Nobody likes a copycat or wants to be mimicked. Watch
the people on TV talk shows and analyze how they interact with each other in
gesture, posture, manner, and so on.
You wouldn’t show up at a formal event in jeans and a tee-shirt—at least
I hope not. By the same token, you would not attend a beach party in a
Looking for a job or new
If possible, observe the other person’s environment ahead of time.
Notice how their coworkers are dressed. Is it a casual place such as a
souvenir and gift shop?
How about a bank? Usually a more conservative way of
dressing is the norm. You want to look like you belong in the environment
where you are selling yourself, representing a product or a service.
I once worked
for a publisher of a farming magazine. Periodically he would dress up in
overalls, an old plaid shirt, old worn work boots and a battered hat. Then
he would personally visit the farmers in their pastures, barns, orchards and
crop fields—looking just like them. Needless to say, he was hugely
successful and very popular with his advertisers.
If the other person speaks rapidly or slowly, you
pace yourself to be in sync with them. If they have an accent or a regional
dialect, do not attempt to copy it, unless it is native to you. The other
person will immediately sense it as false, and they will become annoyed.
If you are
walking with the other person, maintain a similar gait. Allow
your gestures to move at a similar speed as them. The idea is to
get into their space and experience life from their perspective—as much
as you can.
If the other
person uses a lot of visual words in their dialog such as, "I SEE
your point," "Come LOOK at this," "I want to SHOW you something," then you
do the same.
If the other person uses a lot of auditory words such
as, "Did you HEAR that SOUND?" "You don’t have to SHOUT!" "Let me TELL you a
story," you also use lots of auditory words in your conversation too.
the other person uses a lot of KINESTHETIC (touch, taste, smell) words such
as, "Something doesn’t SMELL quite right," "You better GRAB this deal," "Can
you HANDLE the order?" then you do it too.
Get on the
same wavelength as the other person and you will begin the process of
achieving rapport with them. How will you know when the other person is in
rapport with you?
When you change some part of your behavior or speech
from what the other person is doing, and they unconsciously start to follow
your lead, that is when you truly have rapport.
the both of you have been leaning back and you suddenly lean forward to make
a point. If within a moment or two, the other person also leans toward you,
then you can now close your deal or pursue your objectives.
Be patient. This
can sometimes take a little time to achieve; however, it is well worth it!
most of the people you meet, you will automatically find yourself falling
into rapport with them quite naturally and easily.
Occasionally, you might
find yourself up against an individual who is overwhelmed, overworked and
irritable. That is when you need to trot out your skills toolbox and
begin to really pay attention to the other person and get that rapport
When you have accomplished that, you will be amazed at how they begin
to calm down and start paying attention to you and whatever you are selling,
whether it be a product, a service or yourself.
well-known fact that people buy from people they like. Job recruiters, human
resource people and managers hire people they like best—not necessarily the
best qualified applicant.
Even we will go out of our way to be around people
that we like and who make us feel good.
life and in all our relationships, we tend to look for ways to get people to
like and accept us. After all, if we are liked and accepted, we get the
things we want from them.
Sales is all
about selling ourselves and getting the other person to like us. If the
other person takes a liking to us, they will go out of their way to buy from
us over anybody else.
Of course, we need to be well informed and
knowledgeable about the products or services we are selling; however, that
alone will not help us get all the sales we want.
So how do we
get more people to like us? Simple! We convince them that we not only have
much in common with them, we also let them know we like them—even
if within your own mind they are not very likeable!
becomes win-win when the other person likes you, is delighted with the
product or service, and you have made a sale!
Doctor of Clinical & Counseling Psychology
Anxiety/Depression Care Coach & Alternative/Holistic Counselor
Certified Expert in Advanced Hypnosis and Neurolinguistic Programming (NLP),
Dianne Ruth, PhD can legitimately boast a 97% Success Rate.
coached thousands of clients over the past 37+ years enriching the success
of not only multi-millionaires but financially strapped students as well.
Dr. Ruth specializes in short term,
drug-free anxiety and related depression recovery by phone.
inquires Call Dianne at (619) 961-7500.
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